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A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan)

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Post  Amazing Pan-Sensei Sat Jun 27, 2015 12:19 am

Read the title loser.
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Post  Not Manchee Sat Jun 27, 2015 12:28 am


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 2a535afc-3e6f-4e1d-9f29-9468ddd6a128_zpsalxoaagk

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462737240_zpse88ea985

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462729095_zps481a57e8

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Stegs had been banging her fists against the bar, trying to catch the barman's attention, for quite some time now. She was starting to get tired of being ignored by this guy, who clearly pretended that she wasn't actually there, so that he wouldn't have to repeat for the third time that she didn't look old enough to drink.

"Liss'n 'ere ya sniv'lin lil' twat-"

She growled, getting up and moving to the stool that the barman was in front of and grabbing him by the collar, pulling his face so it was inches from hers- he could probably feel the heat coming out of her scales, much hotter than any human's regular body temperature.

"Yo's gonna gimme a fugg'n scotch or I'ma 'ave ta 'ardboil yo' ass."

The dino girl's body may have been tiny, but her tight grip on the man's shirt was not to be underestimated. She spoke and acted like a truck driver, and she had the truck keys to confirm that that was, in fact, what she was. Having had to deal with incompetent bartenders telling her she wasn't old enough to drink, when she was considered old in her home planet and was used to only drinking stuff that tasted like the alcohol on Earth, she had grown even more sour.

"This 'ere that yo's doin' is discrim'nation 'tis! I 'ave my rights!"

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It's cause I got a tail ennit?!
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Post  Amazing Pan-Sensei Sat Jun 27, 2015 12:46 am

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 110


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Layout10
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It was rather quiet in the bar, besides a few small scuffles and Stegs it was an oddly boring night at this particularly nasty place. That was... until Tampa Bay itself paid a visit to New Gotham. The door slammed open as a hunched figure slowly walked in... it was done in a way so dramatically that practically everyone in the bar was looking at him. He seemed to be an old man, he was at least in his 60s, though in great shape for his age regardless. He wore some sort of military uniform which was open revealing a dirty wifebeater. He had a scruffy beard that looked not unlike a Yorkshire terrier. And his eyes, gazing into his eyes was like looking into the infernos of hell itself! "WHEREZ MAH DAYUM FLAHMINGOS YAH DARN DIRTEH AHLIENS!?" the man yelled in a broken, raggedy voice. A couple of bikers just sort of stared at the man, before letting out some laughter... this warranted a hateful look from the old man, whom then picked up an empty glass bottle and smashed it against a biker's head. What ensued was a huge barroom ball that involved a toenail clipper, Ipod Nano, a starfish, and several beetles. Eventually, the old man stood triumphant. Lighting himself a cigarette, even though there was clearly a no-smoking sign behind him, Old Man Washington looked to the remaining bar patrons and spoke in a slightly more calm voice "Mah name is Old Man Washin'ton! Ah'm hea fo one reason an' one reason only.... DA GREYS STOLE MAH FLAHMINGOS! Yah wouldn't happen tah know where thea ah would yah...?" the old man then pulled out a shotgun and shot it at nothing in particular. Just to be disruptive.

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"Where me FLAHmingos yah son uffa gunz!!!"
Sarge's Theme - Swamp Gas
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Post  Not Manchee Sat Jun 27, 2015 12:56 am


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 2a535afc-3e6f-4e1d-9f29-9468ddd6a128_zpsalxoaagk

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462737240_zpse88ea985

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462729095_zps481a57e8

♤    ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈    ♧

Stegs was one of the few people in the bar that didn't immediately turn to stare at some old guy's entrance. She was much too worried about getting her scotch...so while the barman scurried away, fearing both herself and the old man that had come in, the girl went ahead and took a whole bottle from behind the bar. She then heard the old man's yelling...and the chaos that ensued following some biker's laughter. The dino girl couldn't help but enjoy this nice little brawl- it wasn't a good Friday night if there wasn't a good old bar brawl -and she even jumped off of her stool, approaching the fight to get a few kicks in here and there, because why not? By the time that the fight was over, Stegs had already gone back to her stool, and was carefully savoring the stolen scotch, turning with arched eyebrows to look at the old man, who was victorious.

"Bravo.."

She muttered, raising her bottle and quickly hiding it under her shirt as the barman turned to look her way. She didn't owe him anything, she had her rights. It was then that Old Man Washington introduced himself and explained the whole flamingo business he had been yelling about. Now, it was clear that this man didn't like aliens, as he was convinced that they had robbed him...so Stegs saw no harm in cheating the man out of whatever money or wealth he may have.

"Oy! I know 'bout some fl'mingos... Could prob'bly tell ya 'bout 'em too...for a price."

Apparently the random shooting wasn't enough to scare the small dino girl away..

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It's cause I got a tail ennit?!
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Post  Amazing Pan-Sensei Sat Jun 27, 2015 1:08 am

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 110


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Layout10
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Washington sniffed the air, before snarling and growling at literally everyone in the bar... he looked at nearly everyone in the eyes, and none of them looked back, that was, until Stegs spoke up. Old Man Washington let out a puff of smoke as he looked to Stegs "Hmmm..." Washington approached Stegs, flipping a chocolate coin to the bartender "Two scotches..." he spoke with a broody mutter, the bartender did get the scotches, after all, why say no to a guy with an armed shotgun? The old man took a sip of the scotch, his rage seemingly softening but his insanity just as strong as ever "You've gat mah attention..." he spoke, before cocking his shotgun "Dah GRAYS stohl mah flahmingos... Ah'm on ah mishion to git em back..." he explained once more, before slowly sucking his cigarette into his mouth and swallowing it.

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"Where me FLAHmingos yah son uffa gunz!!!"
Sarge's Theme - Swamp Gas
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Post  Not Manchee Sat Jun 27, 2015 1:19 am


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 2a535afc-3e6f-4e1d-9f29-9468ddd6a128_zpsalxoaagk

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462737240_zpse88ea985

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462729095_zps481a57e8

♤    ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈    ♧

Stegs looked impressed as Old Man Washington managed to effortlessly get two scotches out of the bartender...for a chocolate coin. Maybe she should start carrying a shotgun around.. She nodded at the man's story- he had made it pretty clear that he was looking for flamingos. Stegs, being an alien, didn't actually know what flamingos were, and she most definitely didn't get that they might not be actual flamingos, but Washington didn't need to know that.

"Ye I been seein' some o' dese 'grays' yo's talkin' 'bout.. Carryin' dese...fl'mingos."

She reached over to take the second scotch, despite the bottle that was hidden under her shirt.

"I'd be will'n ta help fo', say.. Fifty dolla's?"

The girl reached across the bar to some other patron who was smoking a cigar, and took that straight from his mouth, eyeing him threateningly as if challenging him to object...which he didn't. She then took to smoking the man's thick cigar just as Washington gracefully swallowed his cigarette.

Da's kinda nifty...I'll ask 'im ta teach me later...

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Post  Amazing Pan-Sensei Sat Jun 27, 2015 1:37 am

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 513


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Layout10
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Washington's eyes seemed to widen just a bit as Stegs claimed she recognized his flamingos, in THE HANDS OF THE GRAYS NO LESS. A single manly tear streamed down his cheek as his fists clenched, to which he spoke in a low voice "Done. Anythin' fo dah flahmingos..." he replied, standing up as he finished his last scotch. He stood above Stegs, looking right at her with his rage-filled eyes as he asked "Where did da grays take mah flahmingos...?" he asked bluntly... it was time to get to work.

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"Where me FLAHmingos yah son uffa gunz!!!"
Sarge's Theme - Swamp Gas
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Post  Not Manchee Sat Jun 27, 2015 1:50 am


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 2a535afc-3e6f-4e1d-9f29-9468ddd6a128_zpsalxoaagk

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462737240_zpse88ea985

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462729095_zps481a57e8

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Stegs allowed herself to grin, satisfied with herself, as Washington accepted her offer. Now she'd just need to lead him on long enough to request an advance payment, then run off before he could figure out what was going on.. She just needed to make her story more convincing now.

"I seen dese grays 'round de Brook- s'where alla dem weirdos 'ang 'round. Should prob'bly head ova' dere."

She spoke confidently, taking another drag of the cigar before finishing her scotch and getting up, almost letting the bottle of scotch she was hiding fall.. Scrambling to keep the bottle safe, she adjusted its position and leaned against the wall next to the exit.

"Leggo, ol' man."

Stegs had to move her small legs fairly quickly to keep up with regular humans, so as she led the way to the Brook, Washington would probably notice her increasing exhaustion at taking just a few steps. She stopped beside a huge supply truck...and got into it.

"Dis'd be my sweet ol' truck. Get on in!"

Yeah, she wasn't going to do the thing on foot when she could just take her truck, with all the supplies she would be delivering. She threw the passenger door open, ignoring the fact that the passenger seat was filled with kid's meal toys and mysterious stains.

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It's cause I got a tail ennit?!
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Post  Amazing Pan-Sensei Sat Jun 27, 2015 2:07 am

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 513


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Layout10
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Washington rose an eyebrow to the gator as she spoke of the grays being at The Brook "Lock 'n' Load!" he barked out as he cocked his shotgun. Without so much as questioning why a schoolgirl looking dinosaur girl would know information such as this, it seemed perfectly normal to him. Of course, instead of using the door, he just blew an opening in the wall with his shotgun and followed Stegs from there. The veteran got into the side seat without question as well, he really didn't seem keen on asking questions at all really. He was more like: shoot first, forget to ask questions. Upon sitting on a pile of toys and rather odd stains, Washington slipped open a pair of sunglasses from his vest and put them on "LESS GET TO EM GRAYS AND MURDER EM TAH DEATH!" he screamed hysterically before pulling a joint from his vest as well "IT'S AH PRESCRIPTION! DARN DIRTHY CAPS ASKIN' MEALL DA QUESTIONS!"

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"Where me FLAHmingos yah son uffa gunz!!!"
Sarge's Theme - Swamp Gas
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Post  Not Manchee Sat Jun 27, 2015 6:42 pm


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 2a535afc-3e6f-4e1d-9f29-9468ddd6a128_zpsalxoaagk

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462737240_zpse88ea985

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462729095_zps481a57e8

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Stegs seemed impressed by the extensive destruction Old Man Washington was causing, but at the same time she was worried about her truck... So she made a point to warn him

"Ya lis'n now.. Leave my An'belle Lee intact, or we's gon' 'ave trouble."

And with that, she nodded her head at his battle cry. They were already driving when Washington pulled out a joint, and she waved his explanations off.

"Ya do whadev'r ya wan', I jus' wouldn' smoke nuffin udder den a good ol' Cuban cigar. De cops're all prudes.."

Stegs kept driving, shouting out curses once in a while and honking much more than necessary as she broke various traffic laws. This made them arrive at the Brook much quicker, which was good. Making quite a few turns and maneuvers that took more skill than would be expected from the schoolgirl she appeared to be, they stopped right by Brook's Bridge. A group of colorful-haired teenagers and pierced-faced aliens were gathering, laughing loudly and passing a crystal statuette shaped like a strange tentacled beast around, gaping at it as if it were a diamond.

"Aw 'ell, we got here durin' de crazies' rush 'our. Dey's de ones're 'igh offa deir 'eads mos'a da time. I'm pretty sure dis's where de grays're, doe."

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It's cause I got a tail ennit?!
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Post  Amazing Pan-Sensei Sun Jun 28, 2015 5:03 pm

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 112


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Layout10
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Washington nodded in confirmation to Stegs, if he knew one thing, it was to never mess with another man's truck "I know mah trucks like ah know mah heart attacks." he responded to her simply and brilliantly. If the traffic law violations weren't bad enough, Washington opened a window, leading to the smoke from his joint flooding out of his car. All they were missing was loud music and they'd pretty much be the bane of the cosmopolitans existence. However, Washington knew it was time to put off getting high as fuck as he noticed a small collection of teenagers and ALIENS. Washington quickly got out of the truck, cocking his shotgun without really listening to what Stegs had to say. They were young people after all, Washington was intimidated by them. He was afraid they'd make fun of his lack of baggy pants and hip hop talent "GIT OFF MAH LAWN YAH DARN DIRTY GREYS!" Washington screamed like a madman as he fire a few times on his shotgun with little to no attempt at aiming, leading to him just kind of shooting wildly into the air.

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"Where me FLAHmingos yah son uffa gunz!!!"
Sarge's Theme - Swamp Gas
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Post  Not Manchee Sun Jun 28, 2015 7:52 pm


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 2a535afc-3e6f-4e1d-9f29-9468ddd6a128_zpsalxoaagk

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462737240_zpse88ea985

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462729095_zps481a57e8

♤    ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈    ♧

Stegs was glad to know that Washington knew the general code of honor of truckers, and so was fine with just letting him do his think, disruptive as it may be to the elite and middle class that stared at them through their Priuses. The heart attack comment didn't seem to phase her, and she actually replied.

"Ya can say dat agin!"

...Because she obviously had experience with that type of thing. Except not really, but she liked blending in with cranky old men. Of course, Washington's reaction to the alternative teens did not disappoint either, and Stegs played along, knowing that more chaos meant less chances of Washington figuring out that she actually had no idea where his flamingos were.

"Yeh ya dirty 'ippies! Disgustin'!"

..Then Washington was shooting, and though he wasn't hitting anything, it was still probably not something good. She didn't need law enforcement on her, considering how she was still an illegal alien on Earth.

"Oy! Ol' man! Pipe de feck down, willya? Don' wan' git da fuzz on us!"

She turned to the group of teens, many who had now scattered.

"We can' lose'm! Dey'll know 'bout dem fl'mingos!"

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

It's cause I got a tail ennit?!
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Post  Amazing Pan-Sensei Sun Jun 28, 2015 8:06 pm

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 112


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"WHERE MAH FLAHMINGOS YAH DARN DIRTAH GREYS!?" Old Man Washington screamed as he continued to randomly shoot his gun into the air, it was a freaking miracle nobody was actually killed. As the group of teens scattered, the old man let out an angry growl and picked up a rock, throwing it at one of the teens to knock him out "GIMME MAH MINGOS DAMNIT!" apparently he succeeded... which was rather strange. He couldn't aim for his life yet he apparently threw rocks with devastating force and pinpoint precision. Washington grabbed the poor hapless teen and dragged him into the truck, in a matter of minutes he had managed to get a makeshift interrogation room set up with the poor person tied down. Things could only get worse from here...

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"Where me FLAHmingos yah son uffa gunz!!!"
Sarge's Theme - Swamp Gas
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Post  Not Manchee Sun Jun 28, 2015 8:40 pm


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 2a535afc-3e6f-4e1d-9f29-9468ddd6a128_zpsalxoaagk

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462737240_zpse88ea985

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462729095_zps481a57e8

♤    ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈    ♧

Stegs let out a long stream of curses at Washington as he didn't stop his shooting. She looked around nervously, as if expecting the police to arrive any second (which it probably would). Things only got worse as Washington actually knocked out one of the teenagers and brought him to her truck, ready to interrogate him.

"'R'ya feck'n crazy?! Let da kid go! 'E 'IN'T GRAY!"

She growled, her scales heating up as she became angrier and yanked on Washington's arm. This was getting out of hand, even for Stegs. She couldn't afford to go to jail..

"We'll get yo' 'mingos, ye, but not like dis!"

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Post  Amazing Pan-Sensei Sun Jun 28, 2015 9:05 pm

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 112


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Layout10
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"SSSSSSHHHHHHH!!!!" Washington shushed Stegs, he paid no heed to her words, he cared only for his mingos. The teenager was out cold... so naturally the old man bashed his face with a gun until he woke up "WHERE'S MAH MINGOS!? TELL MEH OR I'LL PLAY LOUD CHER MUSIC!" and of course, the teenager just woke up and just started screaming and hyper-ventilating. Washington then began to loudly play Cher music from his iPhone, it's noise only matched by the terrified screaming. And then Washington started to blow some weed again. So that left a lone truck playing loud Cher music with muffled terrifying screams as smoke puffed out from it. Eventually a single Kalem Klub officer noticed this and knocked on the door "Hello? Is anyone there?" "Uhm... NO?" "Oh okay then-" the Kalem Klub officer then walked away without question.

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"Where me FLAHmingos yah son uffa gunz!!!"
Sarge's Theme - Swamp Gas
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Post  Not Manchee Sun Jun 28, 2015 11:21 pm


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 2a535afc-3e6f-4e1d-9f29-9468ddd6a128_zpsalxoaagk

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462737240_zpse88ea985

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462729095_zps481a57e8

♤    ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈    ♧

Stegs kept trying to pull Washington out of his truck, she needed this dude out before she got in trouble, to no avail. As the teenager kept going through all sorts of torture, the dino-girl just kept trying to tell the kid to be quiet, especially when she saw a Kalem Klub officer walking around...and then Washington had to start playing his Cher music.

"Ol' man ya turn dat music off righ' now or'll-"

The Kalem Klub officer approached, and Stegs had to clear her throat to answer...except Washington beat her to it. And apparently it worked.

"Wuh-? Dis law 'nforcemen'.. 'sit f'real?"

She was confused...then relieved. Then not so surprised anymore. Humans could be idiots sometimes, exhibit A: Washington.

"'kay, so we din't die yet.. Now let 'im go so we can look fo' yo' 'mingos."

Stegs was now trying to pull the teenager away from Washington, dragging the young man out by his legs.

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Post  Amazing Pan-Sensei Mon Jun 29, 2015 12:00 am

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 112


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Layout10
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Washington went to get right towards bothering the teenager again once the Kalem Klub officer left "WOT? Dat wasn't law enforcement... dat was mah cousin Richard! 'E invented dubstep! With all the WAH WAH WAH! AND THE WUB WUB WUB!" and then he pointed his gun at the teenagers face, whom them started to scream in terror some more. Like holy hell that was demented. The screaming continued until... flesh and bone started to emerge from the teenager's mouth, it continued until it formed a large body around his old one, his own flesh devouring the chair and the ropes keeping him in place. Eventually this distorted mass of flesh took the form of some sort of creature, which let out an animalistic howl. It was huge and muscular, with some sort of green exoskeleton surrounding certain parts of his body. Washington's jaw dropped for one moment, before he cocked his shotgun "HOLY FUCK DAT ISH ONE UGLY POODLE!!!!" and then he shot it's head off.

And it kept moving.

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Muton10

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"Where me FLAHmingos yah son uffa gunz!!!"
Sarge's Theme - Swamp Gas
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Post  Not Manchee Mon Jun 29, 2015 12:30 am


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 2a535afc-3e6f-4e1d-9f29-9468ddd6a128_zpsalxoaagk

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462737240_zpse88ea985

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462729095_zps481a57e8

♤    ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈    ♧

Stegs didn't even know what dubstep was, so Washington's words seemed to confuse her even more. At this point, the increasing confusion was turning into increased anger- she didn't like this. Pointing the gun at the teenager's face was probably the least abusive thing the old man had done to the teenager this whole time, but it seemed to be Stegs' breaking point

"Yo's better get the feck outta my truck-"

And then the teenager transformed. Now, Stegs had a look of utter horror...

"Aw fek'n 'ell dat does NOT look like it's gon' wash off eas'ly-"

...and it wasn't because her life was in danger, apparently. Her truck was evidently more important right now. Without even paying attention to the creature, Stegs tried to push it out of the way so she could examine the damage she'd have to pay for...or charge Washington for, at least. Of course, Washington proceeded to make an even bigger mess by shooting its head off.

"Can ya fek'n not?! Yo's payin' fo' my fek'n truck's wash, ya dirty hippie!"

She didn't seem to be paying enough attention to the dangerous-looking alien that was way too close for comfort.
 

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Post  Amazing Pan-Sensei Mon Jun 29, 2015 12:56 am

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 112


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Layout10
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Washington shot at the thing again. And again. And again. It's blood and guts getting all over interior of the truck, yet it just kept on moving "TAKE IT TAH DA VET YA DARN TEENAGERS!" he yelled, only for the thing to reach out and... touch his shoulder. The old man stopped, his eyes widening as the thing opened up some sort of connection with him. Slowly... it began to take a more human like form. It's physique was powerful and stunning, though it was doubtfully something that was very alien. It was almost as if the creature was trying to look human but failing immensely. While he stopped for a moment, Washington attempted to shoot at the thing again... only for the bullets to be crushed as they failed to break skin "Aw fuck-" and then it flicked Old Man Washington right out of the van. Slowly, the being then turned to Stegs, attempting to reach out for her as well. It didn't speak, it didn't even seem to breathe, it just seemed to be acting with some sort of single-minded cause.

"KICK EET IN DA NUTS!!"

It didn't have nuts.

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Muton_10

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"Where me FLAHmingos yah son uffa gunz!!!"
Sarge's Theme - Swamp Gas
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Post  Not Manchee Mon Jun 29, 2015 1:07 am


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 2a535afc-3e6f-4e1d-9f29-9468ddd6a128_zpsalxoaagk

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462737240_zpse88ea985

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462729095_zps481a57e8

♤    ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈    ♧

Stegs was way too busy trying to stop her truck from being a total mess to notice what was happening with the alien...but then it was getting more unremovable stains in her truck, and it was throwing Washington about (something she almost thanked it for)...and that reminded her that she was in danger.

"Get outta my truck an' I won' press charges.."

She offered as she reached under her seat, grabbing hold of one of those old metal bars with a lock used to secure the steering wheels of cars. Stegs went on to try and hit the alien in the spot where it would supposedly have had nuts, following Washington's advice, with the metal thing. She didn't look happy to find out that it didn't have any nuts.

"Ol' maaaan-!"

She growled, scrambling to the front seat of the truck and throwing a variety of toys from the passenger seat at the alien, hoping it would be allergic to one of the mass produced trinkets.
  

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Post  Amazing Pan-Sensei Mon Jun 29, 2015 1:25 am

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 112


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Layout10
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Washington fell on his back on the dirty ground, muttering something about old Mexican hats. He was almost distracted by his thoughts when he suddenly looked up and saw that Stegs' attack on the alien's nut failed "NO NUTS!? YAH FUCKED NOW!" the thing wasn't so much as noticing Stegs' attacks, it was just slowly lurching over towards her without care or notice for anything else. Old Man Washington ran back into the truck, hitting the thing's back repeatedly with the butt of his gun to no avail "GIT OUTTA DA TRUCK! WE NEED TAH BLOW IT UP!" he yelled, as much as he knew Stegs loved the thing, he honestly believed that the only way to stop this thing was to blow it up. So he suddenly pulled a stick of dynamite out of his pants and use his joint to light it "'M GONNA BLOW IT ALL UP!" meanwhile Mr. No-crotch was still trying to grab Stegs.

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Muton_10

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"Where me FLAHmingos yah son uffa gunz!!!"
Sarge's Theme - Swamp Gas
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Post  Not Manchee Mon Jun 29, 2015 2:55 pm


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 2a535afc-3e6f-4e1d-9f29-9468ddd6a128_zpsalxoaagk

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462737240_zpse88ea985

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462729095_zps481a57e8

♤    ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈    ♧

Stegs looked genuinely terrified as Washington suggested they blow up her truck.

"NO!!!"

Her shriek was almost one of agony, and she sounded like a little girl for the first time. Instead of letting Washington blow up her beloved truck, she stomped on the accelerator, speeding the truck forward and hoping the sudden impulse would make the alien lose its footing. Stegs then went on to maneuver as dangerously quickly as she could, making sharp turns and sudden stops with her truck to try and shake the alien off.

"We're NOT blow'n'her up!"

She seemed pretty desperate at this point, and was hoping that her violent driving would have shaken Washington and his dynamite off too.
  

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Post  Amazing Pan-Sensei Tue Jun 30, 2015 12:43 am

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 112


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Layout10
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Washington was already attempting to blow up the truck by the time Stegs had the chance to react in horror to the idea "EET'S DA ONLY WAH MAN!" he screamed, tossing the dynamite as his eyes slowly shifted into a glare. He spoke in a somber, serious tone "Dis ees fo' dah mingos..." and so the dynamite dropped right into the truck, right at the alien's feet. The fuse seemed to be running shorter and shorter until finally... it ran out, whilst the alien also fell out of the truck due to Steg's chaotic driving. It would only be moments before the explosive went off and everyone died... except... the boom never happened. It seemed this dynamite either wasn't actually dynamite or a dud. Oh, and now the alien was on the ground with Washington "WHERE'S MAH MINGOS YA DARN DIRTAH GRAYS!?" he screamed as he began to throw an assortment of pens out at the monster, all to no avail.

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Muton_10

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"Where me FLAHmingos yah son uffa gunz!!!"
Sarge's Theme - Swamp Gas
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Post  Not Manchee Tue Jun 30, 2015 12:56 am


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 2a535afc-3e6f-4e1d-9f29-9468ddd6a128_zpsalxoaagk

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462737240_zpse88ea985

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Cooltext1462729095_zps481a57e8

♤    ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈    ♧

Stegs had been driving chaotically, not checking to see if anything had worked- she figured that if the dynamite was gonna blow up, it's not like she had time to save herself, so she kept driving and hoping to achieve something. She finally took a moment to look back, seeing that the dynamite had no, in fact, destroyed everything and that the alien and Washington were out of her truck. She spun the steering wheel, making the truck turn suddenly so she was heading right to where she had dropped the alien.

"Ol' man! Git de feck outta da way, I'm gon' run dis fecker ovah!"

She didn't wait to see if the man was gonna move or not, she just floored the accelerator and braced herself for whatever was coming next: she was either gonna squash the alien and be really happy that it was over, or there would be some serious injuries in her near future.
  

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Post  Amazing Pan-Sensei Mon Jul 06, 2015 4:34 pm

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) 112


A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Layout10
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As the alien looked at the truck, he began to notice something... the truck was getting closet. It just stood there, staring at the truck, seemingly unaffected by the pens throw at him by Old Man Washington. It was as if the thing just had vacant eyes. Meanwhile Washington realized his pens weren't working, so he went up and got his shotgun again "OFF MAH LAWN YOUNGLIN'!!" he screamed, aiming at the alien... only for it to take a step to the side. It was then successfully out of the way of the truck, which was instead now heading straight towards Washington whom was pointing his boomstick at it. The old man could hear Stegs screaming for him to get out of the way... instead he just stood defiantly glaring at the truck, muttering "Don't tell meh what tah doo!" and then...

The truck, Washington, and the alien were suddenly encompassed in a bright light shooting down from the sky. They were suddenly floating up into the air towards... A UFO!

"AH KNEEW EET! DA GREYS! DA GREAYS! GIMME BACK MAH MINGOS!!!"

A Gator and a Drunkard Meet at a Bar (Chee y Pan) Muton_10

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"Where me FLAHmingos yah son uffa gunz!!!"
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Amazing Pan-Sensei
Amazing Pan-Sensei
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